xabbeylongx's reviews
167 reviews

Just cannot get into it. I hope to come back to it at a later date, but it's just not entertaining me at the moment. 

I’ll be honest, I had really really high hopes for the book, but I was left feeling unsatisfied. To me, there was absolutely no chemistry between her and Conrad. Neither his words nor his actions were appealing, they were so hurtful to Belly, and she deserved much better. I think if the flashbacks with him had been more emotional, or even the glimpses of Conrad Belly gets in the present when she’s sure Conrad must feel the same way, then it might have made it a bit more of gut-wrenching story. As it is, he just seemed like a bully, and everyone seemed to be okay with him treating her like that. 

In fact, I have a bone to pick with everyone in this book, apart from Susannah, and, at a push, Laurel. Conrad, Jeremiah and Steven have always been leaving Belly out, making her feel alone, sad, insecure and uninvited. Then, as soon as she finds someone who’s nice to her, they try to ruin it. They’ve spent their whole life making her feel less than special. Susannah - as mentioned in the book - definitely did spoil them, because no way should Belly have been treated like she should. Possibly ageist, possibly sexist, I just found it downright uncomfortable reading the flashback scenes, just because there was pure malice in every reaction towards Belly. 

However, Belly ins’t an angel. Although Taylor is insufferable - even more so in the book than the TV series - just don’t be friends with her if you feel that way about her? And also, there were times when she sounded really spoilt herself. All in all, I didn’t really like any of the characters as much as I wanted to. Even Cam, there was something about him, and I just couldn’t bond with his character. 

The plot itself felt very repetitive at times, sometimes even boring. It just felt like it was a circle of I hate him, but he’s nice to me so now I like him again, I’m going to string Cam along even though I don’t really have any feelings for him, and then I’m going to do it again. 

I think the biggest thing wrong with this book was the lack of emotional attachments. I’m only being picky with the plot because I felt I didn’t have a strong connection with the characters, which, for me, is the most important part of a story. I kept hanging on, waiting for the moment where I really bond with one of them, but it never came. I’m a big Bonrad shipper, but honestly, there was nothing in this book which screamed to me that they should have been together, and that was definitely what was missing from a this book - it is a romance, after all.  

 

We follow Belly through this book, as she and her family, Steven (her older brother) and Laurel (her mother) are travelling down to their friend’s summer house to stay with them. Laurel and Susannah (her mother’s best friend) have been friends since forever, and so their kids were, undoubtedly, going to become friends too. Conrad (the older son) and Jeremiah (the younger son) have been friends with Belly and Steven since they were little. They have spent many summers going to their summer house, and staying until it was time to go back to school. The dads aren’t really invited - Belly’s dad has amicably divorced with her mother (her instigation) and is dating people suitably younger, whilst Conrad and Jeremiah’s dad is always busy with work, so they never see him. 

This summer, Belly has ‘grown up’, and become ‘more pretty’. People notice her more. Boys notice her more. But she has never been interested in anyone other than Conrad, who she has harboured a crush on for years now. Susannah, who treats her like the daughter she never had, tells her that she knows Belly is destined for one of her boys. Belly hopes that this is true! 

Things are weird when they get down there. Conrad doesn’t seem like himself. He’s reserved, he doesn’t want to talk to anyone. There’s some sort of weird air hanging around, and although everything is different, everything is the same. Conrad, Jeremiah and Steven are hanging out, and she’s trying to get involved, as she’s sixteen now. 

When she goes to a party, she meets Cam, whom recognises her from a school event, and they start talking. They start to talk, and they both like each other, but Jeremiah and Conrad keep messing things up. She talks to him, and goes on dates with him, but her emotions are conflicted. She wants to save Conrad, but he doesn’t want to be saved. She’s trying to move on, but he is nice to her and then she likes him again. And then, Jeremiah admits his feelings for her, out of the blue. And then they find out that Susannah is sick, and the boys knew all along, so all the fights were due to that. Belly feels deceived. 

This summer is all about making it count, because they all know it might be the last one like it. 

If I’m being extremely harsh, I think this book was a little too similar to Arnold’s ‘Skellig’. In my opinion, although the morals in this story were quite good, it also felt a little too much like Arnold’s, and I don’t really think that enough was dissimilar for it not to be a copy. It’s unfortunate, because it was a simple read, it was a nice read, and we got off to a very good start, but I just felt the ending was very lacking for me. I like the morals in the story, the importance of friendship, but also, I think PS’s actions weren’t justified, and Nate didn’t deserve that. I think there would have been a better moral of friendship with Caleb, but that’s just personal preference. I also think the actions of his mother were 'normalised', which I think could possibly be detrimental for the age group reading this, but this is a reality for some children, so it's fair enough.
However, my tutor has enlightened me, and given me something to think about. His mother's actions weren't 'normalised', as I put it, but it was actually inclusive to people in real life who are young carers. It's an isolating feeling, being a young carer, and so this book will make them feel seen, and less alone. So, I take back my point on that. In addition, my tutor said 'Skellig' is a book about finding peace with yourself and writing, which is exactly what Goodfellow is trying to do with this book too. Again, it's a good point, but I still do think it's too similar, and it doesn't work for me, personally speaking. 

 

We follow Nate as he goes from Year 5 into Year 6. He’s nearly in big school now, and he’s facing his SATs this year. He has two younger brothers, Jax (8) and Dylan (4). Dylan believes he is Spiderman, and is seen as the ‘baby’ out of them, and Nate and Max often play video games with each other. Their mother normally goes out with their neighbour, who’s called Auntie San, and they often go to Bingo and get drunk, coming home and laughing at ridiculous hours of the morning. 

Nate’s best friend in the whole world is PS. They have been friends for years, and Nate never wants anything to change about it. Unfortunately, in Year 6, they are arranged into two separate classes, and Nate and PS aren’t in the same one. Nate is gutted. Not as gutted, however, as when he finds out that PS has been on holiday and seen none other than his enemy and bully, Turner, and has pretty much become friends with him. PS starts to hang out less, text less, and then he stops responding at all. He even goes around with Turner, leaving him out, and no longer walking to school with him. It gets worse, because Turner still bullies him, and PS starts to join in! He feels betrayed. 

His new teacher, Mr Joshua, is lovely, and really kind. He gives Nate a book to write his ideas down, as Nate is really good at poetry. He helps him, as he sees what troubles he has in his friendship with PS. They bond over Skellig, as he really likes Arnold’s books (fun fact, the author idolises David Arnold as an author!) and they are learning about it in class. He starts hanging out with Caleb, who is similar to him in mindset. 

Everything goes downhill when Dylan, his brother, is rushed to hospital. Before he is in the hospital, he is pronounced dead. When Turner teases him for it, PS turns around and hits him, and suddenly, they’re friends again. 

Dylan is still alive, but in hospital. He has endocartitis, which is a congenital heart defect, and he has an infection, which means he could be fighting for his life for a while, unless they get rid of the infection. It happens again, and they know that he has to go into surgery. 

Just like with Skellig, Nate’s sibling is rushed into surgery to try and fix their heart. And it works! He’s back, good as new, and everyone is so relieved. Nate passes his SATs, goes off to secondary school with his friends around him, and a newfound talent for poetry. 

Quite interesting, but just can’t get into it 

This book was a simple book to read, and I read it in less than an hour. 

The overall word to describe this book is just that: ‘simple’. As it should be for a children’s book. The characters are simple, easy to understand and also quite realistic. Same with the plot. A lot of fantasy elements to the story, which are quite prevalent to the audience it is made for. I liked the moral of the story, in that ‘the grass isn’t always greener’, and they also learn how to solve problems by themselves, and are faced with different moralistic dilemmas. The story itself was told in a very intriguing way, and the narrator had really good, really interesting dialogue. 

In truth, I found this book a little repetitive, but that might be because I am not the intended audience for the book. Also, there were a few sexist and racist ideologies I wasn’t a fan of, and it made me quite uncomfortable, especially for a children’s book. I know it was written in a different era, but still, it took the enjoyment out of the book for me, unfortunately. 

 

When they arrive in London, six children are left alone with the servants, as the parents go off to visit a sickly relative. Five of the younger children, Cyril, Anthea, Robert, Jane and ‘The Lamb’ are playing and come across a Psammead. They are almost like sand fairies, and they grant wishes, but these wishes only last until sunset. They find him burrowed in gravel, and they ask him for wishes. They have various different wishes granted, like having being rich, having everyone in the world want their baby (‘The Lamb’), and also having wings, but all their wishes backfire. The money they get is currency that they can’t use, various people try to steal ‘The Lamb’, and then their wings disappear while they’re on top of a tall tower, and they can’t get down! 

Despite this, they go back every day to ask for wishes… sometimes once, sometimes twice! Each time a wish is granted, they are faced with problems that they have to solve, that sometimes questions their morality - such as stealing and lying! Eventually, everything goes back to the way it was, when the parents return and almost get arrested for stealing the Queen’s jewels, and they know to leave the Psammead alone from now on, having exhausted him of all their wishes. 

This is my second attempt at reading Gay’s memoir, and I finally finished it, this time. There are quite a lot of trigger warnings, so if you’re likely to become affected, this book isn’t for you. 

I don’t like to criticise memoir’s, as I don’t think it’s right; someone has poured their heart out, and if you’re talking about the content the memoir, it can get really personal. So, I’m going to start off by saying that I really liked this book because it was so personal, and Gay bared all by writing it. It has a lot of content that others would maybe try and hide, as she did for all those years, but I really like how she now tells us about it. Her character growth is insane, and I love reading about it. 

Second of all, I’d like to say this book is so thorough, so in depth, and it’s nice to read a memoir so realistic. I, too, struggle with my weight, and it’s so incredibly refreshing to read about someone with similar-ish struggles to me. It’s validating! Reading about everything that has happened to her, every personal hell she’s had to deal with… I mean, there is a lot I cannot comment on or even begin to understand. However, with regards to the weight prejudice and the eating disorder, I really like how it’s not sugar-coated, and I liked reading it from someone else’s POV. 

I’d say that, personally for me, some of the writing itself was a bit repetitive. I liked the small chapters that were put in, but sometimes, they weren’t necessary. A lot of the time I was reading over it, and I was thinking that I had already read it, but it was actually a different part. It also had a bit of a mismatched order, in my opinion, but I am a stickler for chronological memoirs, so that’s just my preference. It was quite a good read though, even if I found it did take me a while to finish it. 

 

Roxane Gay talks about her struggles with her weight, and her experience with eating disorders. 

After an incident of r*pe from someone she loved and trusted, she turned to food for comfort. She wanted to be in a ‘bigger’ body, in order to keep herself safe, and to try and stop people from looking at her. She ate and she ate, until everyone around her was worried about her size. 

She dropped out of college, and disappeared for a while, wanting to get away from her parent’s disappointment. She gave her body to many people, men and women, because she felt she didn’t deserve to be treated nicely. She wanted to lose weight, but she would lose weight, and then become nervous because of the attention, and then would put it all back on again. She wasn’t happy with how she looked, and tried many diets. For a few years or so, she would often would eat as much as she could and vomit it back up. Slowly, she was learning how much she was damaging her body, and she was starting to try and change her mentality and find herself worthy of love. 

Have a load of other books I need to read for uni first! 

Another short and sweet read, one that I really enjoyed. 

I thought this book covered so many important topics; racism, no matter how casual and subtle; foster care and the system; the criminal system; grief; and the ability to say sorry, and how powerful that word is. Also, if I’m not mistaken, there might be a hint of autism in our Charlene, but I think it’s really good to have autistic characters in YA books, because the representation is so important for people growing up with autism! Makes everything a lot less lonely, I can’t lie. 

I love Charlene to pieces. I love her personality, her attitude, her way of thinking… it resonates a lot with me, I think. I’m quite protective of her. The other characters - most of them, I should say - I’m not a massive fan of, but I think that’s due to Lawrence’s beautiful writing. Everyone just seems really selfish, and I quite like how she’s captured the essence of humanity so well, and realistically. 

The only thing I would say is that this book is way too short! I like Charlene, I love that she’s true to herself and won’t ie, even if it does get her out of trouble. I love how much she values her relationship with Kandie, and I’d argue that she’s one of my favourite characters I’ve read about. She’s definitely the realest - I would have loved to have read a book bout Charlene as a kid. But I definitely think this story could have benefitted from a more concrete ending, but also, ending it on a feeling of hope is quite a nice touch too. 

I read this book in a day, and I would definitely recommend. So much is talked about, and it really enlightens you. Plus, Charlene is the most amazing character - definitely make the time to read it!! 

 

We follow Charlene, who is in the foster care of Annie. Charlene loves to knit, and has been knitting a dinosaur blanket/hoodie for her sister, Kadie. They were separated after their mum died, Kadie’s dad not having enough room to take her in. Charlene went into the foster system, whilst Kadie stayed with her favour. Eventually, Kadie became ‘too upset’ to have Chaz visit, and their visits got stopped altogether. 

Charlene has been dealing with a lot of different things. She’s been moved around from foster home to the next, to different schools, and she knows that, if anything happens, it’ll be off to the next home for her. Annie has a son, Blake, who isn’t really fond of her, as she has taken over his bedroom since he has moved to uni, but she doesn’t have to put up with him much. Annie says she’s in it for the long run if she is, and Charlene really likes her. 

Charlene doesn’t like to say sorry to people who don’t deserve it - whereas other people might just bite their tongue and get on with it, she doesn’t. Her friend smashes a makeup vial on the floor, and they run off before they can take the blame. The security guard, who has been staring at her since she walked in, as if willing her to do something (she’s a person of colour, and deals with casual racism), and he becomes intimidating. Annie comes and gets her, but that isn’t the only time she’s refused to say sorry. 

A few girls in her class are being racist in her favourite lesson, History, and acting up. They have a Black supply teacher, with a name that is quite difficult to pronounce, and they were taking the piss. Charlene stood up for her, and ended up getting excluded. 

Now, through everything, Charlene has one constant, and that is her knitting. She has her project for her sister, which she’s hoping she’ll be allowed to give her in person, and she guards it with her life. So, when Bake’s back from uni and decides to unravel her project, she sees red. She stabs him in the hand with her knitting needle. 

The police are called, and she spends time in a cell. She has her appropriate adult, vera, and a lawyer that isn’t very good, in that he moves onto the next case as quick as he can and tries to rush things. Charlene doesn’t know why she bothers, because Annie won’t want her back, and it’s even less likely she will be able to see her sister. 

She goes to see her. Kandie’s dad calls the police, so she breaks a window, but all she fells is shame. When they come to collect her, she kicks the car, and then the police. She’s taken back to the cell, with a different appropriate adult this time, someone who’s Black. She helps her, and tries to give her advice. 

When she is released, Annie wants to see her after a while. She has been in and out of homes, and truly misses Annie. All she wants is to see her sister. Annie promises to help her, but she must be willing to say sorry, and make amends for what she’s done. Charlene promises to try, because all she wants is her sister. 

This book was just beautiful. Very well written, the story just flows, and it kept me hooked with every page - I finished it in one day because I could not put it down! 

I love the entire story. I love how when everything ‘ended’, Row still continued fighting for their lives. There was no panic, or no overdramatised actions, they simply just got on with it. I really like the tone of this story, and it definitely made it more enjoyable to read. It felt like I was reading into a diary, into someone’s mind and their thoughts, and I loved it. 
I really liked how the characters weren't sugarcoated, even Row through her son's eyes; I think that made it a bit more personal to the characters, and definitely helped me to develop a connection with the characters, which I think would be difficult if we didn't know their inner monologue - these characters, for example, seem to keep their emotions to themselves, most of the time. 

Minor nitpicks is that both Row and Dylan both have very similar writing styles. Personally, I would have liked to have seen a bit more of a difference between their inner monologues, as they are both two separate people. That would have made it perfect. 

Also, I would have loved if it was a bit longer; more details! I want to hear all about Dylan’s dad, more about Greta’s, more about the before of The End. I would genuinely have loved it if this book was written entirely by Row herself, the way she sees things and recounts them, is just gorgeous. Really beautiful story, and definitely makes you think a lot about how life is now. 

Overall, a really lovely story, a quick and emotional read, and would definitely recommend! 

 

We follow Dylan and his mum, Rowenna. It takes place in the Welsh countryside, post-nuclear tragedy. 

When they’re out foraging, they find a blue book, with blank pages. Row gives it to Dyl, hoping that he’ll use it to write. He, however, wants both of them to write; he wants his mum to write about before The End, and he wants to write about the aftermath of it. 

So that’s what they do. 

Everything was normal, and then, one day, it wasn’t. After a terrifying article on the news, people start panic-buying food, and so does Rowena. When the nuclear power plant goes off, many people have already left. Row and Dylan go to sleep with the quilt wrapped up tight beneath their chins, and they sleep. 

When they wake up, it’s eerily quiet. All the birds had flown away from the big mushroom cloud, and many people had moved away. Some, like their neighbours, Mr and Mrs Thorpe, even moved closer to it, knowing they would die. Their sons were unlikely to have made it, so they knew what they were doing. 

Row and Dylan made a life for themselves. She wasn’t keen on stealing, but, as days went by and no one returned, she would go into places and take food and clothes, and other things that weren’t being used. On her travels, she met a man, and they ended up falling in love. She doesn’t know what happened to him, but he left his mark on her - and in her (awful pun). Unfortunately, she doesn’t know whether he’d had enough or had been killed, but she never saw him again. 

Despite having no healthcare at all, she had a baby, and called her Greta Mona. It was just the three of them. Despite the harsh weather, they manage to battle through illnesses with little to no medication, even though it’s touch or go. They hunted for their own food, made their own homes, grew fruits and vegetables. Winter was hardest, especially when sickness came by, because no one would grow anything. They didn’t have to go out, and they hardly ever came across people - not people who were alive, anyway. Dylan marvelled at the few memories he had of him as a child, how things were before. He was shocked that people would pass each other in the streets and not say hi! 

Unfortunately, Greta became so sick that she didn’t make it. Dylan had to bury his own sister, and his mother didn’t take it well. Not only had she stopped teaching him (there was, apparently, nothing left to teach anyway), she also withdrew emotionally. She had already become hard due to The End, but now she was even harder. 

After a while, they began to hear helicopters and police sirens, and Row knew that her life was moving on. But, she didn’t know if she was ready to go back to how things were… she felt that she had become her true self after The End. 

Nothing wrong with the book itself, I just have a lot of uni reading to do before I commit to reading any other citizen books. Looking forward to reading later.