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A review by anyaemilie
Gay the Pray Away by Natalie Naudus
5.0
Thank you to the author for the ARC!
I'm a little late with my review for this one, since it was published on June 4th, but I did get to listen to some of the audiobook as well, so I'm not TOO sorry. Natalie Naudus is one of my favorite audiobook narrators, so when I heard she was writing her own book, and that it was based on her own childhood growing up in a religious cult, I was immediately intrigued.
I, fortunately, have no experience with any kind of religious trauma, but this book HURT. It was painful to know that this fictional novel represents the very real lives of so many queer kids trapped in a system that not only oppresses them and tries to squash the queerness out of them, but actively hates them for who they are.
I have an odd fascination with religious cults and have watched way too many documentaries about them, and they're all the same when you come down to it: men are in charge, women are meant to be subservient, and anything that strays from heteronormativity must be destroyed. All of these groups have warped and twisted the bible so far from its original meaning and live by such rigid rules that it's hard to even call it Christianity anymore. Valerie, the main character of this book, lives in exactly this kind of cult. Her only exposure to homosexuality is by way of sermons preaching about the sin of the gays until, one day, she finds a mis-shelved copy of One Last Stop at the library (which is a fun Easter egg: Natalie narrated the audiobook version).
After that, her entire world turns upside down, helped along even more when Riley, an attractive outsider (who happens to be queer), joins the cult after being expelled from her previous school. Valerie uses her relative freedom to learn as much about the outside world as she can at the library. Being homeschooled since 3rd grade, she has known nothing but the Institute's teachings since then, and is extremely sheltered about the rest of the world. She learns that she is, in fact, in a cult. She starts to question everything that her parents and the church have taught her about her position in life. And she gets angry.
Even without suffering any religious trauma, this book was hard for me to read at points. I can't even imagine how hard it was for Natalie to write, having grown up in this environment. I hope that writing this, and subsequently narrating the audiobook, was some sort of catharsis for her and was healing in some way.
I wholeheartedly recommend this book and I hope that it finds its audience. Maybe someone like Valerie will stumble upon <i>this</i> book in the library one day.
I'm a little late with my review for this one, since it was published on June 4th, but I did get to listen to some of the audiobook as well, so I'm not TOO sorry. Natalie Naudus is one of my favorite audiobook narrators, so when I heard she was writing her own book, and that it was based on her own childhood growing up in a religious cult, I was immediately intrigued.
I, fortunately, have no experience with any kind of religious trauma, but this book HURT. It was painful to know that this fictional novel represents the very real lives of so many queer kids trapped in a system that not only oppresses them and tries to squash the queerness out of them, but actively hates them for who they are.
I have an odd fascination with religious cults and have watched way too many documentaries about them, and they're all the same when you come down to it: men are in charge, women are meant to be subservient, and anything that strays from heteronormativity must be destroyed. All of these groups have warped and twisted the bible so far from its original meaning and live by such rigid rules that it's hard to even call it Christianity anymore. Valerie, the main character of this book, lives in exactly this kind of cult. Her only exposure to homosexuality is by way of sermons preaching about the sin of the gays until, one day, she finds a mis-shelved copy of One Last Stop at the library (which is a fun Easter egg: Natalie narrated the audiobook version).
After that, her entire world turns upside down, helped along even more when Riley, an attractive outsider (who happens to be queer), joins the cult after being expelled from her previous school. Valerie uses her relative freedom to learn as much about the outside world as she can at the library. Being homeschooled since 3rd grade, she has known nothing but the Institute's teachings since then, and is extremely sheltered about the rest of the world. She learns that she is, in fact, in a cult. She starts to question everything that her parents and the church have taught her about her position in life. And she gets angry.
Even without suffering any religious trauma, this book was hard for me to read at points. I can't even imagine how hard it was for Natalie to write, having grown up in this environment. I hope that writing this, and subsequently narrating the audiobook, was some sort of catharsis for her and was healing in some way.
I wholeheartedly recommend this book and I hope that it finds its audience. Maybe someone like Valerie will stumble upon <i>this</i> book in the library one day.