Book safety, content warnings, and tropes down below.

But life didn’t wait for healing. It just carried on whether we were still hurting or not.

I finished the book a few days ago, but I needed to sit with it for a while. Feel all the feelings, and think all the thoughts. It feels criminal to try to sum up these books in the typical reviews I do. They really are so much more than a short list of tropes and content warnings. Both of those things are of course important, but it can never explain a book entirely.

This was what I’d come here for—to prove to him that I was worthy of being his friend, to try and repair what I’d broken.

The third and final book was maybe a smidge less angsty than the first two, but it was in no way less emotional. Maybe the most difficult bit is all the guilt Peter is dealing with still, and how he's trying to rebuild relationships and regain trust. I find the books very realistic, which means that these things aren't achieved easily. Daniel is sweetness personified, he has a savior complex, as well as trust issues, and I love him a lot. Daniel doesn't really trust Peter, and although this is more than understandable after the previous books, it's heartbreaking to read.

I wanted to make up for the entire last year of my life, for who I’d been to him and Leslie, and for what I’d done to them both. But I also needed to find a way to prove it all to myself—not only to him, but to me. This wasn’t just about Daniel. It was about being the person I wanted to be.

There's been so much hurt and angst in the trilogy that I spent the third book just wanting things to be okay and for everyone to be happy. I'm honestly not sure if we got that or not, but I did end the book feeling hopeful for the characters' futures.

Lying for so long had stolen my ability to know who to trust. For that matter, could I even trust myself?

⬇️ Blanket spoiler warning ⬇️

⚠️ Tropes & tags ⚠️
Friends to lovers
Trilogy slow burn
HFN
Troublesome ex
Edging
Set in the 90’s
Hurt/comfort
College

⚠️ Content warning ⚠️
Side character hospitalized
Death of a side character
Alcoholic parent (relapse)
Custody/family dispute about siblings
Unsafe sex (side character)
Sexual self harm (side character)
Side character diagnosed with HIV
Brief mentions of physical and sexual abuse of a side character (past, off page)
Physical abuse (parent, side character, off page)
Side character disowned and cut off from family

⚠️Book safety ⚠️
Cheating: No
OM/OW drama: Yes, Adam is a constant force. Peter does not go back to him.
Breakup: No
POV: 1st person, single POV
Genre: Historical/coming of age/romance, M/M
Strict roles or versatile: Versatile
MCs age: 19 and 22

“[…] You ruin things. You take love and make it ugly. I don’t want you anymore.”

What was this miasma of sneering pride and wrenching pain? Did it have a name? How could I take a picture of it? It was so ugly, sharp, and mean.

I hung up before he could say another word. I had to get off the line before I let his love and my sick need for it pull me under.

Daniel was beautiful, inside and out, and being with him didn’t make me feel like I needed to take photos of myself curled up in corners of abandoned buildings, or haunted and alone in mirrors, documenting love bites from a guy who would never love me in public.