big note off the top: I appreciate the writing style of this memoir, and that the audiobook was narrated by the author! it's always a treat when an author reads their own work.

I struggled with some of the terminology (specifically around

kink

) and concepts (specifically around topics like fanfiction). mostly due to it being substantially more graphic than I was anticipating, especially when it came to

sexual exploration as a youth and adult

and descriptions of

medical experiences

. all in all I think I would have benefitted from content warnings, or otherwise some more heads up in chapter names.

all that said I found myself often resonating the experiences explored, and generally appreciated learning more about the ones I didn't have first hand knowledge of. 

4.5 ⭐️ 

Reading banned books likes its my mission on earth

It ended rather abrupltly, that was jarring. It felt very immersive otherwise. It was a very honest account of eir experiences. Some of the scenes were very disturbing in it's graphic depiction of undergoing a trauma on the body. That was difficult to read.

Instead of a banned book, this should be required reading.

This could be really informative to anyone, from a young teen who knows very little about queerness to a they/them adult who had  different experiences. It’s useful to hear about other people’s journey. I particularly was surprised (and loved) how this book ended- not with a declarative “I know exactly how to exist now” but with a, “I’ll try again next time”. I think everyone just wants to have everything figured out, and the idea that you don’t have to, even as adult, is a refreshing one.

This graphic novel gave me so much to think about. I went into it without any expectations other than it has been banned, so I know the stupid conservatives hate it. Honestly that's always a plus to me. I found myself introspectively reading it; there was a lot more identifying going on than I expected. I really, really appreciate how raw, real, and relatable Maia was with this book. People all over the world can identify with eir feelings, and they probably don't even know it yet. If someone doesn't identify with any of Maia's feelings, they probably know someone who does. 

*1/2-1 star off for the multiple Harry Potter references. I understand that Maia is trans, so e is someone who should be able to discuss HP if ey want. However it is still triggering, and I just wish we could erase all mentions everywhere by everyone since JKR keeps furthering her harmful anti-trans views and desire for anti-trans regulations passed everywhere. I think everyone, including all trans people, should reevaluate what about JKR is so valuable to them despite the hurt and harm she causes. I was hoping that since I bought the new special edition, all HP references would have been edited out. Mentioning HP instead of keeping it vague adds nothing positive to the story. It just adds triggering content.*