This book spoke to my soul. I knew the ending as soon as it began but the characters became so real to me and so the ending was so painful. It was a perfect read that explores love and loss and everything in between. It’s perfect because it’s not. It’s going to be one I will forever keep close to my heart.

I went into book pretty blind. I didn't really know what it was about except for the fact that it was sad. Now I will say I read this book in a day. And that's the ONLY reason why my rating is as high as it is. I found this book really entertaining and very fast paced. And that's probably the last of my compliments for this book. 

I knew this book wasn't gonna be a 10/10 for me once I read how unreasonably fast Lucy fell for Gabe even though she hadn't even spoke to him yet. And then when he pulled that stunt with his ex-girlfriend that's how I knew it was gonna be THAT type of relationship. I'm gonna state this right here and now what Lucy had/felt for Gabe was not love. I believe it was closer to LIMERENCE (I capitalize it because people seem to confuse the two; please look the word up it will really open your eyes on the difference variations between love, infatuation, lust, obsession, and attachment). 

Now I see a very common theme in a lot of romance books/movies where the main character always describes love as their "big high" and a "wildfire" and "adrenaline rush". But I don't see it that way at all. If the feeling of bliss isn't there after all that "rush" is gone then I don't feel like that it was love to begin with.

Now I'm not saying that Darren was the best alternative, but he was clearly the better . And is the "love" really worth it if you're facing the ultimatum of hurting other people especially the people you love. Throughout the whole story Lucy is just obsessed with this guy who doesn't respect her life or her time at all. Gabe only calls Lucy when he needs her not caring about wrecking her peace in the slightest. And always took every opportunity he had to insert himself into her life. And my goodness Lucy seriously has no self respect because I honestly can't believe how she couldn't see how manipulative Gabe was.

He lied to her and messed with her feelings the first time they met when he kisses her and then immediately gets back with his ex. Then later when they reconnect again he leaves her with a broken heart to pursue a career that he didn't even consult her on before he took the offer. He only communicates with her when he's in crisis. He shows her pictures to the world without her consent. And then even when he's dying he makes her power of attorney giving her the decision to chose whether he lives or dies. And for some reason Lucy is so over smitten with this dude that she'll literally fall to his feet with a snap of a finger.

Or she saw it and chose not to care. She was willing to put her entire life that she built for her family, her husband and kids

by not only emotionally cheating on her husband to actually physically cheating on him

just to get this "high" that she felt for a dude. Ridiculous. I'm not negating the fact that Gabe did "love" (nope not love) had very strong feelings for Lucy too, but I seriously believe this is not the type of "love" anyone should aspire to have/strive for. A love that consumes who shouldn't engulf you in its flames.

And even with her relationship with Darren, albeit Darren was not perfect, she never really communicate with him enough. And constant comparisons she made throughout the whole book about Darren and Gabe were getting infuriating. She never let herself get over Gabe at all. Like she didn't even want to. And that's not healthy. What her and Gabe had was not healthy. This reason being why I didn't find the ending sad. I found it annoying because if in the end Lucy still had still undying devotion to Gabe and is still lying to her family.

Also I'd also like to add that using 9/11 as a motif is extremely distasteful of the author. It literally had such a minimal impact on the story and I feel was used to exaggerate the "tragedy" that is their love story. People lost their lives that day and for some reason the author decided it was a perfect time for the Gabe and Lucy to kiss while thousands of people are dying. Ridiculous again!🤦🏾‍♀️😒

Crazy sad.

This book shattered me like no other. I found a surprising relatability with the main character that drew me in.
The emotions I felt in the last 1/4 of the book were raw and real. A book I will no doubt continue chewing over for a very long time. 

This is a conflicting book showing the reality of relationships and how things don't always go how they "should."