I loved watching Special, so when searching for a queer love story and saw that this one was written by Ryan O’Connell, I knew I had to read it 🥰

I loved O’Connell’s candour. In this ableist world, how do you live as a disabled, queer man? How do you navigate love and sex? 

I really loved that he didn’t simply stay with Gus out of convenience and whatever else. Elliott’s character development was so natural and necessary 👏🏼

Short and sweet, but still packed with lots of great tidbits. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it 🥹

4.5 out of 5 stars for me, thank you ✨ Content warnings below!

My thanks to Atria Books for both a digital copy of this book through Netgalley and a physical copy for review consideration.

Let me start this review with a readerly tip: When an author tells you how to read their book, listen to them.

I started this one in little snippets when I could get them during off time at a conference, and I was really not vibing with the book at all. I found it forced and inauthentic. When I got home, I sat with it for a more concentrated window, and I found myself vibing with it and genuinely enjoyed the storytelling. That's when a lightbulb went off in my head, and I realized, "Oh, O'Connell wrote short chapters on purpose to propel the reader, and this is a story that's meant to be devoured." So take my advice and binge read this book.

This book is really funny and full of a lot of charm. It is clear why O'Connell's storytelling in shows like Special and Queer As Folk has been so endearing to audiences. Also, as July is Disability Pride Month, I think it's important to highlight the important anti-ableist messaging he shoves in here. Make sure you are always confronting the biases you've internalized.

My one gripe with the book is that it gets a little overly earnest at the end. I get that it is very important to confront your addictions and divorce yourself from enabling relationships. However, at the risk of sounding like an alcoholic, the staunch sobriety message that O'Connell takes us on to round out this narrative feels a tad preachy.

TL;DR - A tad over-earnest, but incredibly charming

Quotes:
How strange that we can saw off certain parts of ourselves, so we remain confident in one area, an area that is challenging for other, only to feel completely honest in another. (42)
I depended on the validation of my coworkers, and when I didn't get that, it threw me off my axis and took away my superpower, which is disarming people and winning their approval. If I wasn't the laser-focused perfectionist perpetually triumphing over something, who was I? (126)
Devon never became a successful writer, but he does ad copy in Portland and lives with his husband, named Jarrett. We follow each other on Instagram. Last week I "liked" a picture of him kayaking, and he wrote, "congrats!" on an Instagram post about my career. What can I say? Modern life is hell. (149)
I'm learning the more you want things, the more likely you end up with nothing. (197)