I saw this one going around last year and had it in my tbr back pocket since then, a little skeptical of the hype. I didn’t know what to think of it at the beginning, because you know, insta lust and I don’t always get along. But my relationship with this book progressed the same as Christina’s with Patrick; slow and steady and sure. There was some magic in their dark, depraved dynamic that pulled me in and never let me go. I wasn’t all in when we were only in her head, but as soon as we started getting Patrick’s pov I was thoroughly invested.

Christina’s struggles with herself and the world around her were painful yet very real. Some of her actions are frustrating, but not entirely out of the realm of desperation. But Patrick tho. We throw around the word stern brunch daddy willy nilly these days, but he’s the literal and figurative embodiment of the term. I mean, he actually prepares her breakfast daily you guys 🥲 He’s the ideal dom with a knack for delivering humiliation kink and then he goes and rocks the praise kink too? Hot dayummm Patrick, with you and your dirty hurty mouth! He of course, has deep dark ugly secrets and the usual man capacity for stunted emotion but he’s a bleeping teddy bear underneath all that damaged control freak 😭

The last few percent of the story goes wildly dramatic but that somehow really works and heretofore one dimensional characters get some depth. This is as much a coming of age story as straight up erotic romance as we see Christina come to terms with being her best self at the same time as she’s discovering her darker desires.